Autumn (goddessrenpet) wrote,
Autumn
goddessrenpet

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Why, hello. It's been two years....

A friend and I were talking about livejournal the other day...so I decided to come take a look at my old one.The last time I updated was over two years ago...that seems like a lifetime ago. So many things have happened in my life. I figured I'd update it. Mainly for me, since I know no one even looks at this anymore, but I figured, what the hell. I've been writing in this off and on since 2001, might as well.

The biggest accomplishment I've had since 2005 is that I'm now a Uconn graduate. I graduated in December 2008 with honors. It's been such a relief to be finally done with school. Since then I've been doing the whole full time working thing. The job I was working at when I was a student had asked me to stay on under Special Payroll to help out until the end of June (this past one). Just recently, they asked me to continue on for another year. As it is, I have a few opportunities for a more permanent position with benefits, which would be great. My boss and coworkers here are really helpful in my search, which is nice. I wouldn't mind staying in the University. It has nothing to do with my major, but I like it. It keeps me busy and it's changing. Plus, they have great benefits and if I decided I wanted to go back to school, I could get my masters at Uconn for dirt cheap.

Since my last entry, I've moved about a bajillion and one times. Well, maybe not that much, but close enough. In Summer 08, I moved out of Briar Knoll into what I now call "The Bug House." After a month of living there, I found out that my room, and my room only - not my stuff, but the ACTUAL room- had bed bugs. That's the worst experience anyone could ever go through. I tried to do what had to be done, with the Orkin or Terminex people, but after a few months of not living there, I couldn't take it. So I left. Packed up all my stuff (all bug free, thank God), and moved back to Stafford...I know, I know, but at the time, it was a very smart decision. I moved into there last November, not even a year ago, well it will be soon enough. Just three weeks ago, or rather, a month now, I moved from Stafford to Wethersfield. Best move I've ever done. I feel so much happier out that way than I have in a long time. And despite what everyone told me, the commute is not bad. It only takes me a half an hour and I hit no traffic either way. And besides, it's closer to everything else in my life - all the important people I love - so that makes up for the commute to work each day.

I've been fortunate enough to make some incredible friends in the last two years. I'm not even exaggerating. The people I have in my life have helped me through so much...turmoil. And because of them, I came out in one piece. I've also become better friends with a few, well to be honest, only two, people I had been close with at one point in high school and had drifted from slightly while in college. I never thought I'd have such a great group of friends to hang out with, but I do. I love them all.


I feel like I should mention my relationship with Jim, since my entire livejournal, from the time I met him in May 2002, is about him...whether directly or indirectly. Jim and spent the majority of 2007 in and out of breaks. Well, I should clarify, cause it wasn't exactly like that. In Feb 2007 we decided (I say we, but it was his idea, I just went along with it) to take a break. That lasted about a month until we got back together. About 6 months later or so, in September, I think, we (again, same deal) decided to take another break. That one lasted a few months before we were back on track again. We were together for all of 2008 until February of this year, when it was called quits for good. I wont go into detail about what happened and all that stuff, since this entry is for me, and I know what went down. But the end result is that we're over.

Six months later, I'm happier than I ever thought I would be. I never knew how strong I was until it was over. And now, looking back, I see that it wasn't that great of a relationship. There were tons of flaws that I chose to ignore. Why? I don't know. I liked the fairy tale notion of marrying my high school sweetheart. Things had stopped being good years before it was over. I don't regret the relationship at all...Jim and his family helped me through a lot of hard times. I definitely wouldn't be here without them. But, I can honestly say, life is better now.

About two months into the break up, around the end of April, I was out with a few of my friends and I met Spence. We've been seeing each other ever since. Things with Spence feel...right. He's helped me realize things about myself I had forgotten or had never known. He's restored my faith in myself and my ability to love (myself, others, what have you). It's nice to feel wanted and special again. Being with him feels more real. This feels like a real, grown up relationship. It's more like equals. It's been a long time since I've felt this good. I'm happy and I can't wait to see how things go with him. I'm not thinking of forever at the moment (not that I would mind), because as life had shown me, you can't plan everything out...just go with the flow.

So Livejournal, that's been more or less my life for the last two years. Summed up for you in 7 neat paragraphs. I'll try to come back and update again sooner than 2 years, but no promises.

~Autumn
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